Guide to building Rom-Con
It all begins with an idea.
Yup, you read that correctly, ROM-CON. This is my cute nickname for Romantic Confidence (aka feeling sexy, sensual, and powerful). And this isn’t necessarily geared towards any romantic relationships with a partner (although it can help). It is truly about the relationship you have with yourself and how easy it is to access feeling sexy everyday. I have been working at this for years. After becoming a mom, it is so hard to hang on to feeling sexy. It is like a muscle and if you don’t use it, you lose it. So I put together some of my favorite ways to connect with your sexy side!
Feel free to comment below with your favorite ways to feel sexy!
MUSIC
Let’s start here because it is a given. Music can bring so many emotions to the surface and can be incredibly useful in making someone feel sexy. I have included my Boudoir Spotify Playlist below but there are so many sexy playlists you can search for!
There is a mix of songs on this list. I like to start with uplifting hype music like some Lizzo and Beyonce. Then we move into some slower more sultry music to help you drop into your body and ground you.
MOVEMENT
Movement is a great way to drop down into your body and feel yourself (literally).
Yes Honey Studio - Femme Flow (I am always down to attend this class, let me know if you want to go!)
Pink Lemon Studio - I’ve taken a heels class and chair dance class so far. I left feeling so amazing and sexy! And people come at all levels.
The Fitness Marshall on Youtube - prepare to laugh your ass off as you shake it
@ruthpilatesstudio - this Instagram account incorporates play and feminine movement into yoga practices
Improv at home - just put on a song that makes you feel sexy and explore movement with no judgement
KNOWLEDGE
This is actually a favorite of mine. I love learning about new things! For me, the best resources have been books, TV shows, and podcasts. Learning more about how our bodies work and how much love and respect our bodies deserve, can really move the needle!
Sex, Love, Goop (tv show)
How to Build a Sex Room (tv show)
OMGYes (instagram @omgyesdotcom)
Sex with Emily (podcast)
Pillow Talks (podcast)
The Body is Not an Apology (book & workbook)
Body Talk (book)
CONNECTION
Okay, this one is more geared towards a partner and the relationship.
Paired App - answer daily questions that help you connect and learn about one another
Where Should We Begin - A game by therapist Esther Perel (her podcast is great too!)
Therapy!!! We love some couple’s therapy for help with communicating and connecting
FANTASY
Give me all the books y’all. I love reading so much and fiction really exercises the muscles to move from “adulting” to feeling romantic. Below are a few of my favorite books or series along with the genres! THESE ARE ADULT BOOKS! I also have some spicier recs if you are interested. Let’s just say Booktok found me and there is no going back!
A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J Maas (series) - fantasy with lots of spice
The Rebel Blue Ranch Series by Lyla Sage - Romance, great characters, beautiful setting
Love, Theoretically by Ali Hazelwood - Rom-com books that are hilarious and spicy
I’m dying to try the Quinn app which is audio erotica. I love a good spicy audio book if the narrators are great. And look for duets!
Some other rom-com authors I like:
Max Monroe
Amy Daws
Liz Tomford
Tessa Bailey
LINGERIE
I have a whole blog on it here! I love wearing lingerie and it really helps boost my confidence and make me feel beautiful!
Boudoir Session Flow
How to prepare for your Boudoir Session
Hello Gorgeous!
I’m so glad you are here. I’m so glad you are doing this for YOU! And whoever else is lucky enough to see what we create. Below I will take you through the Boudoir Session Flow. This will include how to prepare, what to bring and what the session will be like. But if you only remember one thing, remember that I’ve got you :)
How to Prepare
This part is so fun! Preparing for a session is so simple and of course I have a few tips for you.
Let’s talk about it: When you book a session, you will fill out a questionnaire as part of the booking process. Answer with as much detail as you can. This helps me get to know you and elevate your session!
What to wear: I looooooove wearing lingerie and finding new and sexy things makes me so happy! I have put together a list of some great lingerie shops and suggestions. You can read about them here: My Favorite Lingerie Shops. Also check out my favorite Amazon Lingerie Picks
Drink lots of water: This is a rule for everyday but especially the days leading up to a boudoir session. It will help you skin look amazing! Also, if you are worried about bloating, stay away from lots of salt or carbonated beverages.
Self-tanner: This is totally optional! I know I feel more comfy with a little tan but pale skin is GORGEOUS! If you are looking for a recommendation, my favorite is St. Tropez Serum (and don’t forget the application mitt).
Get in touch with your sexy side: One of my favorite topics!!! I have created a list of ways for you to drop into you sensual side (and not just for your session but for every day!). Check it out here: Guide to Building Rom-Con
What to Bring
You won’t need to bring much to your session but there are a few things that could be helpful to have!
Bringing a lot of options is always best, even if you aren’t sure. You will see me with a PILE of options anytime I am coming to a session. Don’t forget some alternatives to lingerie as well like sweaters, swimsuit cover-ups, jeans (see my Oh-La-Lingerie link above for some great alternatives to lingerie)
Don’t forget heels if you want to incorporate those into a session. This can be very sexy!
Any accessories you want to use. Think jewelry, hair pieces, stockings, or any other items you want to include.
Your favorite lip product. Even if you chose to use our hair and makeup services, bring your favorite lip color just in case.
Wear comfy and loose fitting clothes to your session to avoid any lines or red marks on your body.
Session Flow
(Optional) Hair and Makeup services are offered as an additional service. If you choose this option, you will be given an arrival time roughly one hour before your session will begin.
When you arrive, help yourself to a beverage! Champagne, mimosas, and water are available along with some light snacks.
We will chat a little bit about how you are feeling. Also, what you want to wear and items you want to incorporate. This is meant to ground us in the moment and get you feeling comfortable. You will still be nervous but I will be there to shoo it away.
Take a deep breath and trust me! I will make sure you are feeling comfortable, sexy, and powerful!
I will take you through all of the posing, angling, and booty popping so you don’t have to worry about a thing. I will mimic the poses for you so you know just what to do. The questionnaire is so important as it helps guide me through your session. I know what to highlight and what you may feel self-conscious about. I will know exactly how to show you off!
Celebrate your session! You will walk out of there on cloud nine baby! Feeling unstoppable and ready to take on the world!
Post Session Flow
You will receive your stunning images via a password protected private online gallery. The timeline will be communicated at the session. My editing style is dramatic meets natural and highlights the gorgeousness that you are. I always include color and B&W versions of the images that are available for you to download from your gallery. I am also available for any questions you may have!
Well lovelies, it is as simple as that! I am here for you every step of the way and you can always reach out with questions. Find me on Instagram (@brandbphotography) Facebook (Brand B Photography) or email me at brandbphotography@gmail.com.
Oh la-Lingerie
UPDATED 12/30/24
I have been collecting lingerie for the past 6 years and y’all…when I tell you it is a GAME CHANGER, I am not lying.
And it’s not what you think. Sure my husband loves it (and don’t tell him this) but I buy it all for me. Because of how I feel wearing it and how it feels to invest in this part of me. Whether you are buying it for a boudoir shoot, or just wearing it around the house…I 10/10 recommend buying yourself some sexy lingerie!
Don’t know where to start? I’ve got you! Below are some of my favorite lingerie shops and favorite pieces! And scroll to the end for some alternatives to lingerie.
I also have an Amazon list here: Boudoir Lingerie
Treat yo self!
*All of the numbered shops below have a wide range of sizes (at least XS-3X).
Savage X Fenty - https://www.savagex.com
This brand y’all. There is a reason they are first on my list, well several reasons. Let’s start with the wide range of styles and colors, the membership option which discounts items, and the fact it is woman-owned (Queen Rihanna) and BOOM. Oh, and they sell fun accessories, men’s items and athletic wear just to add a cherry on top!
Shop Favorites
Adore Me - https://www.adoreme.com
We have another shop that sells a wide range of lingerie for every personality. But I have to say, they are cheeky and I love it! Their Valentine’s themed pieces are so adorable. They have something for everyone based on how much, or how little you want to show off and offer box sets.
Shop Favorites
Playful Promises - https://us.playfulpromises.com
The name says it all. Their lingerie is fun and mischievous. Pricing is middle of the road but the quality is amazing. Not all of their pieces come in larger sizes but they have a lot of gorgeous items that do! Check out their retro selection if you want to go pin-up!
Shop Favorites
Eddie Green Crossover Wrap Bra
Cleo Contrast Spiral Retro Bra
Thistle and Spire - https://www.thistleandspire.com
The brand is as sexy as they come. The items are a bit pricier but unique and luxurious. The more neutral tones offer a classy but mysterious energy and the pieces are something you won’t see anywhere else! I own the Cirsi Corset and Fringe Benefits Slip and the quality is stellar. I also appreciate their function. Everything is so adjustable so sizing isn’t stoic.
Shop Favorites
Honorable Unmentionables - 10 alternatives to lingerie
Bed sheet
Men’s dress shirt
Oversized sweater
Robe
Slip
Beach Coverup
Swimsuit
Pajamas
Jeans
Birthday suit
It can be as simple or as playful as you want. I’m always here to help with brand recs and styling. Happy shopping boo!